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#29938
mmmazemelissa
Moderator

Welcome to the forum!

It sounds like you could have vaginismus.

It is great that you can successfully insert your fingers.

Do you use tampons?

I think a visit to a gynecologist can be helpful, but many gynecologists are not used to seeing patients with vaginismus, and many don’t know how to treat it. It is possible that your hymen is still intact, and that is why when you first tried intercourse you might have felt a tear at the vaginal opening. That is very normal, and some women have a thicker hymen that might be more of a barrier for penetration, and a gynecologist can help determine that.

I do think vaginal dilators would be really helpful for you, and I encourage you to purchase a kit and start a home program.

If you can already insert your finger, you most likely can insert the first dilator easily. Slow progression through the dilators will give you confidence in your body and your ability to have penetration. Once you can insert the largest dilator, that is about the size of a penis, you should be able to transition to intercourse.

If you are in the NY area, I encourage you to make an appt with us at Maze and we could guide you.

We are also doing a distance dilation coaching program if you are not in our area that would probably be very helpful when starting the dilation process.